So a patron of mine asked me if I would get married someday. I said maybe. It depends. Then I realized that it depended on my success. I have to find success in what I do good. I don't want to be successful at something other than what I WANT to do good. Does that make me selfish? Or does that make me protective?
I think nowadays people get married because they want to. Before they did it for social status, a better future, a better life. We have a choice now. I think most people would choose not to for the sheer fact of less drama. What does getting married entitle us with? A lifelong partner. Is marriage the meaning of having a FUTURE with someone? Can't we have one without it? Is a legality issue when it comes to what you get to keep and not to keep? When does it all just phase out for the better good or the judgment of good?
I know I would delay for the mere fact that I can barely support myself financially and emotionally. How the hell am I to juggle two? Its a balancing act for sure, but when the dance is all done... its not just two. Now there's three. And its not a balancing act anymore -- its a dance routine.
Monday, December 28, 2009
Perform lobotomy
If I could create an antigen to stupidity, I would. I don't know how I grew more patient every year, but I did. I think I just grew too tired to fight. Or perhaps, I learned to fight better. Getting angry becomes a waste of energy. And for sure not worth it. But is that a healthy transgression for the future?
Some of us are lobotomized naturally. Born abnormally tranquil and sluggish. Some of us induce ourselves to a lobotomized state with pills, alcohol, hallucinogens or other substances. I, for one, know I am not born still. I was born with motors in my brain. Whatever my brain thinks up, my body follows. Boredom makes me lazy. Boredom drives me to ponder. Even if I appear to be still my mind is racing a mile a minute.
Still I always pose the question why. Why are people walking in this world like zombies? Why are they not aware? Why do they languidly follow the way of the corrupt world? To be popular? To be a part of society? To be "socially" normal? If you trust the universe doesn't it take care of you? When you ask for a sign doesn't it give it to you? Is there something in the chickens we eat that induces us to a lobotomized state of dumbness? Is going green a social reform or a new wave trend for the millennium? Are you a victim of social lobotomy?
Some of us are lobotomized naturally. Born abnormally tranquil and sluggish. Some of us induce ourselves to a lobotomized state with pills, alcohol, hallucinogens or other substances. I, for one, know I am not born still. I was born with motors in my brain. Whatever my brain thinks up, my body follows. Boredom makes me lazy. Boredom drives me to ponder. Even if I appear to be still my mind is racing a mile a minute.
Still I always pose the question why. Why are people walking in this world like zombies? Why are they not aware? Why do they languidly follow the way of the corrupt world? To be popular? To be a part of society? To be "socially" normal? If you trust the universe doesn't it take care of you? When you ask for a sign doesn't it give it to you? Is there something in the chickens we eat that induces us to a lobotomized state of dumbness? Is going green a social reform or a new wave trend for the millennium? Are you a victim of social lobotomy?
Saturday, November 7, 2009
To be real or not to be real?
So my friend Lawrence posed this question:
So I ask: Aren't you entitled to having secrets or just something that entirely belongs to you? So you have something that only "me, myself and i" knows -- its yours. You don't have to lose everything in the name of honesty or being "real'. Besides who's definition of "real" are we going by? For instance, do we believe everything that happens on tv? Seriously how is it "reality" tv when its scripted?
Question?...is it considered not being "real" when you don't let any one person know everything about you? Or are you just protecting yourself?
Answer: Well that depends if that is for "one" person or "any" one person? Depends on what you are protecting. Will it hurt more if that "certain something" of your history equals "everything" about you entirely. Or if it will hurt for the truth to come out of the closet. The truth has a way of coming out sooner or later, but timing is everything. Isn't that what they say? But on who's timing? Isn't it always when you are ready? However, how do you when is the right time or when you are truly ready? We are set to go to preschool and kindergarten round the ages 4-5 years old. They have an age restriction on when to start. They're is a cut off date. Same goes for paying the bills. What if I'm not ready? Don't they say too bad?So I ask: Aren't you entitled to having secrets or just something that entirely belongs to you? So you have something that only "me, myself and i" knows -- its yours. You don't have to lose everything in the name of honesty or being "real'. Besides who's definition of "real" are we going by? For instance, do we believe everything that happens on tv? Seriously how is it "reality" tv when its scripted?
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Observatory Road
Traffic have a funny way of putting things into perspective. It is an open invitation to observe the world around you. It is a test of patience and perseverance on the dedicated road you are traveling and putting it in perspective on the goal ahead - usually homeward bound (wherever or whatever home maybe). More often, we change route and take the side streets. But how many have us kicked ourselves by doing so only to be stuck into a more hideous traffic jam!
Well, I came up with this question the other day as I was driving home, caught in some rush hour traffic and observed a very peculiar situation.
"Who observes whom? When do you know that you are the observer or the one being observed?"
I was at a cross light lit green but of course unable to budge forward due to some heavy traffic. All three lanes were bumper to bumper. I was in the most right lane next to the signal pole where I see two people waiting to cross the street. One man was tall, blond haired, fit and either going for a jog or was jogging. The other man was short, Asian and obviously gay. For the sake of easy reference, we're gonna call the the blond man "Tom" and the short man "Bob". To my funny surprise, I followed what they were looking at. "Tom" was checking out the girl driving in the car ahead of me. Whose car had a sticker that said 'Rothrock Allentown, PA' to which I immediately related to since my first car was from 'Rothrock Springfield, PA'. And "Bob" (who looked like he was 17) was staring with no shame up and down at and landing his eyes "Tom" on the man's "package" area. I swear I saw "Bob" gave himself a half smile! Then the car in front of me pulled up, "Tom" stared up and crossed the street. "Bob" stared at "Tom" walking fast across the street and skipped across fast following deaden behind -- still half smiling.
Much to my amusement as this incident made the time go by it made me wonder. If I was watching "Bob" checking out "Tom" checking out girl in 'Rothrock Allentown, PA' car, who was watching me observe them? Was I safe to observe this whole time and create a series of mini observations from each of their own point-of-view? Of course with my opinions of what could be said in their minds. Did the 'Rothrock' girl know that "Tom" was checking her out? Did "Tom" know he was being checked out by "Bob"? Did they all know I was watching the whole thing unfold?
Well, I came up with this question the other day as I was driving home, caught in some rush hour traffic and observed a very peculiar situation.
"Who observes whom? When do you know that you are the observer or the one being observed?"
I was at a cross light lit green but of course unable to budge forward due to some heavy traffic. All three lanes were bumper to bumper. I was in the most right lane next to the signal pole where I see two people waiting to cross the street. One man was tall, blond haired, fit and either going for a jog or was jogging. The other man was short, Asian and obviously gay. For the sake of easy reference, we're gonna call the the blond man "Tom" and the short man "Bob". To my funny surprise, I followed what they were looking at. "Tom" was checking out the girl driving in the car ahead of me. Whose car had a sticker that said 'Rothrock Allentown, PA' to which I immediately related to since my first car was from 'Rothrock Springfield, PA'. And "Bob" (who looked like he was 17) was staring with no shame up and down at and landing his eyes "Tom" on the man's "package" area. I swear I saw "Bob" gave himself a half smile! Then the car in front of me pulled up, "Tom" stared up and crossed the street. "Bob" stared at "Tom" walking fast across the street and skipped across fast following deaden behind -- still half smiling.
Much to my amusement as this incident made the time go by it made me wonder. If I was watching "Bob" checking out "Tom" checking out girl in 'Rothrock Allentown, PA' car, who was watching me observe them? Was I safe to observe this whole time and create a series of mini observations from each of their own point-of-view? Of course with my opinions of what could be said in their minds. Did the 'Rothrock' girl know that "Tom" was checking her out? Did "Tom" know he was being checked out by "Bob"? Did they all know I was watching the whole thing unfold?
Friday, October 9, 2009
The Great Speech
So people have asked me what my quote "Caged birds sings, too" means. It is posted at the end of every email I send out as a signature. I have gotten guesses that required no thought that made me want to reply "DUH!" to very literal guesses and right on down long winded, out-of-this-world philosophical thoughts. Who knew a thought that came to me one day out of the blue could pose such an interested audience?
Well, I have always dreamed of being someone famous that would have to give a grand speech. And ever since I was a child, I would sleep and in my dreams give these amazing moving speeches. My sister told me that some nights I would swing my arms about as if I was making an enlightened speech to a crowd. She said it was quite entertaining to see me mimic as if I was speaking like Martin Luther King Jr did that historical day in from on the Lincoln Memorial.
And yes, I guess you could say that I hope to be written in history as someone who has spoken a great speech as Martin Luther King Jr's "I have a Dream", Winston Churchill's "Iron Curtain", and Abraham Lincoln's "The Gettysburg Address". How do you go about the pathway to becoming great and being heard of saying the great speech? Perhaps, you can go about the manipulative way of such fictional characters like The Great Gatsby or The Count of Monte Cristo. Or be inherited in like the Kennedys. But the question isn't "What is a great speech?" It is "Who is your audience and how do you want to change their perspective?"
A great speech is only as good as the posed question. Because isn't a speech merely a great answer or point of view with an unreasonably doubted defense of palpable reasons? Even if the answer is wrong in some way if it is proven to answer the question in some defense to win over the existing argument, isn't it right?
My great line: "Caged birds sing, too." (© 2009, Juyoung Kang). And yes, I said it first. Don't think about using it without my permission for your great speech or book. Think about it. Really think about it. There are many ways to look at this. People have given me the argument of linear opposition which is a typical way of thought of most. Now read between the lines. It compares to what people say "Don't forget the little people."
Well, I have always dreamed of being someone famous that would have to give a grand speech. And ever since I was a child, I would sleep and in my dreams give these amazing moving speeches. My sister told me that some nights I would swing my arms about as if I was making an enlightened speech to a crowd. She said it was quite entertaining to see me mimic as if I was speaking like Martin Luther King Jr did that historical day in from on the Lincoln Memorial.
And yes, I guess you could say that I hope to be written in history as someone who has spoken a great speech as Martin Luther King Jr's "I have a Dream", Winston Churchill's "Iron Curtain", and Abraham Lincoln's "The Gettysburg Address". How do you go about the pathway to becoming great and being heard of saying the great speech? Perhaps, you can go about the manipulative way of such fictional characters like The Great Gatsby or The Count of Monte Cristo. Or be inherited in like the Kennedys. But the question isn't "What is a great speech?" It is "Who is your audience and how do you want to change their perspective?"
A great speech is only as good as the posed question. Because isn't a speech merely a great answer or point of view with an unreasonably doubted defense of palpable reasons? Even if the answer is wrong in some way if it is proven to answer the question in some defense to win over the existing argument, isn't it right?
My great line: "Caged birds sing, too." (© 2009, Juyoung Kang). And yes, I said it first. Don't think about using it without my permission for your great speech or book. Think about it. Really think about it. There are many ways to look at this. People have given me the argument of linear opposition which is a typical way of thought of most. Now read between the lines. It compares to what people say "Don't forget the little people."
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Sacrifice or Compromise
What really is the difference between sacrifice and compromise? When you compromise isn't is the agreement to sacrifice something?
Sacrifice is defined as making an offering, to give up, to surrender. Basically you are incurring a loss of something of equal or lesser value. So technically you gain nothing out of sacrificing. Compromise is defined as to settle, to expose to danger, to consent, to jeopardize. Seems to me that sacrificing is a better way to get a result than to compromise. But why is compromise used more positively than sacrifice? They make it seem like you go through a great amount of suffering when you sacrifice as opposed to compromising. All you are doing when sacrificing is offering to give up as opposed to jeopardizing your settlement in compromising.
Sacrifice is defined as making an offering, to give up, to surrender. Basically you are incurring a loss of something of equal or lesser value. So technically you gain nothing out of sacrificing. Compromise is defined as to settle, to expose to danger, to consent, to jeopardize. Seems to me that sacrificing is a better way to get a result than to compromise. But why is compromise used more positively than sacrifice? They make it seem like you go through a great amount of suffering when you sacrifice as opposed to compromising. All you are doing when sacrificing is offering to give up as opposed to jeopardizing your settlement in compromising.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
East meets west
The modern gold rush-like moving extravaganza has begun!!!
I feel like more and more people are moving to California. We are going to need to pick a new city and make it the "IT" place to migrate. I feel like someone moves to California every hour. My friend, Jeff, moved out west to San Diego last week. And a friend of mine just got me in contact with a friend of his, Erin, who just moved to Los Angeles yesterday! What is going on?
It could be the movement age. Where people are dawning themselves the idea that they are reaching or past 30 yrs old and they didn't go away for college and been near their family, friends, circle for almost a third of their life. They've left to go soul search! Or search something.
I moved out here almost 3.5 yrs ago. So far so good. The job front sucks for the most part. But that's cause usually a blind bat can do what some people who shouldn't have the position do. Oops, did I write that out LOUD!
Regardless, the movement out west has been a trend for years. Its the great migration towards the unknown and opposite. West goes east and east goes west. We are a fickle mind yo-yo-ing the dichotomy of our world. Does that make us hypocrites or open minded? Think about it.
I feel like more and more people are moving to California. We are going to need to pick a new city and make it the "IT" place to migrate. I feel like someone moves to California every hour. My friend, Jeff, moved out west to San Diego last week. And a friend of mine just got me in contact with a friend of his, Erin, who just moved to Los Angeles yesterday! What is going on?
It could be the movement age. Where people are dawning themselves the idea that they are reaching or past 30 yrs old and they didn't go away for college and been near their family, friends, circle for almost a third of their life. They've left to go soul search! Or search something.
I moved out here almost 3.5 yrs ago. So far so good. The job front sucks for the most part. But that's cause usually a blind bat can do what some people who shouldn't have the position do. Oops, did I write that out LOUD!
Regardless, the movement out west has been a trend for years. Its the great migration towards the unknown and opposite. West goes east and east goes west. We are a fickle mind yo-yo-ing the dichotomy of our world. Does that make us hypocrites or open minded? Think about it.
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Rich enough
So my friend, George, posed this question for me to answer:
"How do I become Rich enough to enjoy life? What path? people always say write something... or win the lottery. I am not a rapper, am terrible at sports, don't have the confidence to make it as a professional model, and i am not talented enough to paint a masterpiece... I m highly above average, but not great... weird place to be in..."
Well George, the answer is simple. What does rich mean to you? What do you consider to be rich enough? How do you enjoy life? Answer these questions and you might know what path to take. If you write down your goals, you might finish them. What is it that makes you want to wake up in the morning and do without complaint? At times it seems like getting an education have become easier. But you must make the most out of getting it.
The best thing about being above average but not great is that your fall won't hurt. Its a great place to be. Because then you are adaptable to try anything and make it work. You are not an expert so you'll continuously learn and at the same time excel timely. If you sit so high, the greater the fall. Sometimes it sucks to be the big cheese. You stink more. Because of the highly average people we have doctors, nurses, lawyers, police officers, postal workers, web designers, small business owners, dancers, teachers, cashiers... these people make the world go round. They take care of everyday life. Those are a bigger role than acting, modeling, ball playing, rapping can ever play because even though the other roles are cooler and may effect our lives somehow it doesn't effect us realistically. Those roles help us dream for the real thing. Average people roles help us everyday to balance out our dreams.
My answer to you is that it depends on you. Write down you talents and interests. See what are similar and what are not. Focus on the similarities and you might find your path.
"How do I become Rich enough to enjoy life? What path? people always say write something... or win the lottery. I am not a rapper, am terrible at sports, don't have the confidence to make it as a professional model, and i am not talented enough to paint a masterpiece... I m highly above average, but not great... weird place to be in..."
Well George, the answer is simple. What does rich mean to you? What do you consider to be rich enough? How do you enjoy life? Answer these questions and you might know what path to take. If you write down your goals, you might finish them. What is it that makes you want to wake up in the morning and do without complaint? At times it seems like getting an education have become easier. But you must make the most out of getting it.
The best thing about being above average but not great is that your fall won't hurt. Its a great place to be. Because then you are adaptable to try anything and make it work. You are not an expert so you'll continuously learn and at the same time excel timely. If you sit so high, the greater the fall. Sometimes it sucks to be the big cheese. You stink more. Because of the highly average people we have doctors, nurses, lawyers, police officers, postal workers, web designers, small business owners, dancers, teachers, cashiers... these people make the world go round. They take care of everyday life. Those are a bigger role than acting, modeling, ball playing, rapping can ever play because even though the other roles are cooler and may effect our lives somehow it doesn't effect us realistically. Those roles help us dream for the real thing. Average people roles help us everyday to balance out our dreams.
My answer to you is that it depends on you. Write down you talents and interests. See what are similar and what are not. Focus on the similarities and you might find your path.
Everything's virgin til you make it dirty
Generation after generation, the world gets complicated. Then the world works on getting simple. Feels more like a roller coaster ride. Why do we always have to make it dirty? What was wrong with it before?
With all the glitz and glamour of being something or someone, our heads are living in the clouds. Becoming a household name is some kind of a race these days. For example, now you can publish your own books. Although some are talented, most should just shut up. Voicing an opinion is a right, writing it down for permanence a chore. So what makes the virgins dirty? Is it the fame? The fortune? Or the sheer fact that some just have guts to do it.
I have read many books. I can even say that my education have been a good one comprised of both institutional learning and the real world. The dichotomous notion of having ideals in the real world is sometimes nauseating perhaps because you know your ideas are just a dream and can never really exist except in books and paintings. Its a creation in your mind and each day it sits there -- it breathes, feeds, and grows. It mutants itself into existence, but you never really see it. It starts off innocent and then it shows its fangs.
Ponder this: Why is starting out virgin then getting really dirty (not just sexually) considered a crime or disgusting, but the end result when you are older considered wisdom and experienced? Can you un-virgin something you already made dirty?
Try and apply this idea: Once you moved forward you can only reflect on the past. Because you already know unless you somehow erase it off of memory lane. Born again? Religious fanatics I know your answer: its a spiritual journey. Got it? Then why do you judge and have one perspective? Isn't perspective viewed in many ways? Isn't it right for me to have a perspective?
With all the glitz and glamour of being something or someone, our heads are living in the clouds. Becoming a household name is some kind of a race these days. For example, now you can publish your own books. Although some are talented, most should just shut up. Voicing an opinion is a right, writing it down for permanence a chore. So what makes the virgins dirty? Is it the fame? The fortune? Or the sheer fact that some just have guts to do it.
I have read many books. I can even say that my education have been a good one comprised of both institutional learning and the real world. The dichotomous notion of having ideals in the real world is sometimes nauseating perhaps because you know your ideas are just a dream and can never really exist except in books and paintings. Its a creation in your mind and each day it sits there -- it breathes, feeds, and grows. It mutants itself into existence, but you never really see it. It starts off innocent and then it shows its fangs.
Ponder this: Why is starting out virgin then getting really dirty (not just sexually) considered a crime or disgusting, but the end result when you are older considered wisdom and experienced? Can you un-virgin something you already made dirty?
Try and apply this idea: Once you moved forward you can only reflect on the past. Because you already know unless you somehow erase it off of memory lane. Born again? Religious fanatics I know your answer: its a spiritual journey. Got it? Then why do you judge and have one perspective? Isn't perspective viewed in many ways? Isn't it right for me to have a perspective?
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Eating in or out?
The dilemma of our dining habits leave us to believe that eating is no ordinary habit. Its a social normality. I don't think we are meant to eat alone. Leaves me reasons to believe why for those of us that do eat alone eating out has been somewhat of a comfort. Singles in America today, spend more money eating out to be around people. Restaurants and bars need the singles for repeat business. There's only so many birthdays, anniversaries, and congratulatory celebrations, a family can have and afford. Supermarkets were made for families. Costco was made for mega families and small business owners. And don't forget the homogenized idea of what our society needs as their daily dosage to start their day: STARBUCKS!
I have to admit, Starbucks and eating out were my favorite habits as well. Although I only went to people watch and mostly because I was too lazy to make my own coffee and cook my own meals. Being singles makes you seek outlets where other people linger. Its like finding a haven to be alone but surrounded so not to be completely alone.
My childhood memories are reflections around food. I can't remember anything that didn't involve food. I love going to the restaurants with my family. Eating around at the dinner table together was our designated time to see each other and question Jeopardy answers and fill in the letters with Wheel of Fortune. Eating out for my family were for special occasions. I always held being treated in restaurants to be of utmost service since we were going for a celebration. I have had tendencies as a child to be somewhat on the misbehaving side. I don't think my family were ever demanding or difficult guests at a restaurant, but I always felt like we were treated less than mediocre. Maybe that's why I treat everyone with five star service every time I serve my tables.
So my question to you is: What makes eating out special? What makes eating in special? What are the pros and cons to eating out and eating in? Is it a balancing game?
I have to admit, Starbucks and eating out were my favorite habits as well. Although I only went to people watch and mostly because I was too lazy to make my own coffee and cook my own meals. Being singles makes you seek outlets where other people linger. Its like finding a haven to be alone but surrounded so not to be completely alone.
My childhood memories are reflections around food. I can't remember anything that didn't involve food. I love going to the restaurants with my family. Eating around at the dinner table together was our designated time to see each other and question Jeopardy answers and fill in the letters with Wheel of Fortune. Eating out for my family were for special occasions. I always held being treated in restaurants to be of utmost service since we were going for a celebration. I have had tendencies as a child to be somewhat on the misbehaving side. I don't think my family were ever demanding or difficult guests at a restaurant, but I always felt like we were treated less than mediocre. Maybe that's why I treat everyone with five star service every time I serve my tables.
So my question to you is: What makes eating out special? What makes eating in special? What are the pros and cons to eating out and eating in? Is it a balancing game?
Start of an advice column blog
Do you wonder if there's an answer to every question like there's a solution to every problem?
Do you believe that the answer "I don't know" is an acceptable answer at all?
I believe the answer "I don't know" is really a yo-yo answer to buy time for an assumed answer bound to come shortly. Otherwise, you could quite say "I don't know" every time you are asked a question you don't feel like answering. It is actually quite the cop-out to be thinking and formulating a concrete and educated thought.
I came up with this blog "Ask the Girl Named Ju" after some of friends and enemies have said that I have an answer for EVERYTHING. That I have information whether its the truth or the far stretched out truth. I never like the "I don't know" answer. I mean seriously, can't you be creative and come up with something? Anything? At least for sheer entertainment?!
I have been asked questions in all subject matters: labor law, divorce questions, cooking tips, liquor and drinking, education, sex, jobs, resumes, references, emails, blogs, marketing, event planning, business operations and planning, graphic design, photography, modeling, computers, and the list goes on. I'm no expert, but I have a general sense of what all these subject matters are about and I can carry on a conversation that lasts for more than 2 sentences.
So this blog is to help me help you with any crazy information I may stumble across and give it to you. Think of me as an advice columnist. Except I won't hold back the truth nor would I hold back my tongue. You want the honest and raw truth... you are going to get it. Warning: if you can't take it - then don't ask! I'm not going to beat around the bush or tell you everything is going to be okay. Duh, everything is always okay. Only time marks the wisdom we should all acquire everyday to make the decisions we need to make. Some of us are just sleeping. Wake up!
Do you believe that the answer "I don't know" is an acceptable answer at all?
I believe the answer "I don't know" is really a yo-yo answer to buy time for an assumed answer bound to come shortly. Otherwise, you could quite say "I don't know" every time you are asked a question you don't feel like answering. It is actually quite the cop-out to be thinking and formulating a concrete and educated thought.
I came up with this blog "Ask the Girl Named Ju" after some of friends and enemies have said that I have an answer for EVERYTHING. That I have information whether its the truth or the far stretched out truth. I never like the "I don't know" answer. I mean seriously, can't you be creative and come up with something? Anything? At least for sheer entertainment?!
I have been asked questions in all subject matters: labor law, divorce questions, cooking tips, liquor and drinking, education, sex, jobs, resumes, references, emails, blogs, marketing, event planning, business operations and planning, graphic design, photography, modeling, computers, and the list goes on. I'm no expert, but I have a general sense of what all these subject matters are about and I can carry on a conversation that lasts for more than 2 sentences.
So this blog is to help me help you with any crazy information I may stumble across and give it to you. Think of me as an advice columnist. Except I won't hold back the truth nor would I hold back my tongue. You want the honest and raw truth... you are going to get it. Warning: if you can't take it - then don't ask! I'm not going to beat around the bush or tell you everything is going to be okay. Duh, everything is always okay. Only time marks the wisdom we should all acquire everyday to make the decisions we need to make. Some of us are just sleeping. Wake up!
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